Title: Looking from afar (One Shot)
Author: Andy-chan (antimiya88)
Pairing: Sakuraiba
Genre: AU, Romance, School
Rating: PG
Summary: Sakurai Sho would always look him from afar; afraid of speaking to him. In his mind Aiba Masaki belonged to another world. What he didn't know is that Masaki was also looking... Eleven years have passed since then and the balances have changed. Will they manage to break the distance?
Disclaimer: I don't own Sakuraiba they own me

A.N. Dedicated to all my lovely readers! <3





11 years ago


“Watch out where you’re going! Are you blind?!” was what Sho heard as he was pushed aside by some of his classmates. He secured his glasses and took a better hold of his books.

“I’m sorry” he muttered and bowed.

“Whatever… geek” the others said and burst into laughs, before leaving him behind.

Sho sighed but said nothing in response. It was not that he was bullied – no one dared since he was a Sakurai – but still, he was not counted as someone who was worthy of having friends, or better say any kind of interaction. Isolated by everyone, his best friends had become his books. They were his key of survival. They helped him keep his mind busy and escape this annoyingly lonely reality.

He was heading back to his classroom when his stare dropped out of the window, to the ongoing basketball game. Without realizing it, his steps gradually slowed down till he completely stopped. His eyes were following his figure. The way his legs were running, the way his hands were holding the ball, the way his hair was moving through the air, the way he was smiling, the way he was cheering… everything was graceful, hypnotizing.

Sho felt stupid. He knew that it was pointless to look at him. He was the most popular guy in the whole school while Sho didn’t exist. They were way too far but still couldn’t stop himself from looking. He seemed like the forbidden fruit of paradise. It was already three years now. Sho was looking at him for three whole years. Sometimes he blamed himself for being like that… for being the one who will always become the target of mocking comments… for being the one who would never being able to come closer to him… for being the one who would never have the right to come closer to him.

But why did Sho have started looking at him? Was it his looks? Was it his kindness? Most probably it was both. He was perhaps the only one among his classmates that never laughed along the others over him. He would always say “good morning Sakurai-kun” and that made Sho feel warm. Even if they were not friends and they could never be, at least he was not treating him the same way the whole school did. But still this meant nothing. He was still too bright… far too bright.

Sho’s feet were glued on the spot. A shy smile appeared on his lips as he saw his shoots, one by one, enter the basket, followed by cheerful voices. It was as if the ball was listening to his little prayers. The time on the big board kept counting down. 5 – 4 – 3 – 2 – 1 – 0. They had won. Soon the students at the bleachers were rhythmically calling out loud his name: A-I- BA! A-I-BA! A-I-BA! And there he was smiling… something that made Sho smile even more.

His name was Aiba. Aiba Masaki; the one Sho was secretly looking for three whole years. Tall, handsome, good at sports – or more accurately, basketball star – and friendly; in other words: cool. All the girls wanted him to be their boyfriend while all the boys wanted him to be their buddy. He was elected as the student’s president and representative to the school board; he was always the first to be invited to parties, to karaoke… things completely unknown to Sho.

He didn’t know for exactly how many minutes he had stopped in the middle of the corridor, staring the game like that but it should have been quite a lot.

“Tell me little geek…” a hand fell around his shoulders. “Who do you fancy? Is it Matsumoto or perhaps Aiba?!” Sho’s eyes bulged and fell his face redden but tried to remain as calm as possible. The last thing he wanted is to cause any kind of problem.

“So it’s Aiba… I knew that you were a geek… but gay?! You’re getting more and more amusing you know…” Sho gulped. Kinashita was the biggest guy in his class and it would certainly be a wise idea not to provoke him.

“I was just looking at the game… Kinashita-kun…” Sho muttered with difficulty.

“You were not looking… you were drooling!” Kinashita said mockingly and placed his hand on Sho’s head, tangling his hair. “What a pity to be a Sakurai… We would have so much fun together…” Kinashita took off his hand and made a few steps before stopping.

“You know…” he said in a low voice without turning around to see Sho. “It’s funny how you dare to look up to someone who belongs to another world. Why don’t you remain at your species? You’re a geek… you should know better than me that mixing species can never have good results, aren’t I right?!” Kinashita burst into laughs and walked away, having his hands in his pockets.

Sho remained there, holding his books closer to his chest as his heart was beating like crazy. He already knew that but still why did it hurt when he heard it coming from someone else’s mouth? He felt tears building up in his eyes and tried desperately to blink them away. He looked at his books. That’s where you belong Sho… This is your world…

Without thinking about it twice he ran to the library as fast as his legs could carry him. The library was probably the only place at school he felt relaxed and somehow safe. He had already taken his favorite seat at the end of the room, next to the window. He looked up at the sky and sighed. That’s why you should not look at him ever again… He belongs to a different world… completely different from yours…
…………………………………….


Sho was surprised to hear voices so early in the classroom. He arrived usually one hour before classes just to avoid unpleasant meetings. He was ready to turn and leave when he heard his name.

“I can’t explain it to you better than I already have Aiba-chan please… I have repeated it four times now… what exactly don’t you understand?! Perhaps you should be called Aibaka and not Aiba!” Sho knew that voice. It was Ninomiya Kazunari’s, or simply Nino’s as the relatively small figured guy wanted to be called, Aiba Masaki’s best friend.

“Nino… don’t be mean…” Sho heard Masaki whining. “Explain it to me… just one more time…”

“You know what?! I give up!” Before Sho could leave his spot, he saw the door open and an irritated Nino coming towards him, followed by a desperate Masaki. “Hey Aiba-chan!” Nino said as his gaze turned from Sho to Masaki. “Why don’t you ask Sakurai-kun?! He’s not called geek for no reason!”

“Nino! Shut your mouth!” Masaki said furiously. “He’s an excellent student. He’s not a geek!” Masaki said folding his hands in front of his chest. “You should really learn some manners!”

Nino muttered “Whatever…” and left.

Sho didn’t know what to do or what to say. So he remained there without speaking a single word.

“I’m really sorry. He didn’t mean it! I mean… his tongue might be sharp but he’s not bad…” Masaki said in an apologetic tone.

Sho felt his heart rate accelerating. He was never the receiver of an apology. “It’s… it’s ok… Don’t worry about it… Ai- Aiba-kun…”

Masaki smiled and came closer, his eyes away from Sho’s, shifting from side to side. “Hmmm…. Sakurai-kun… Could you help me with math? We have the test today and I still can’t understand one formula…” his voice was soft and was giving out some sort of uncertainty. “That’s… if you have nothing else to do… I don’t want to be a burden or anything…” Masaki added quickly, turning his gaze on the ground.

Sho took a deep breath. He wished he hadn’t come so early that morning. Not because he didn’t want to help Masaki – God knew how much he wanted to – but that would only make things more difficult for him. He couldn’t decide what to do but seeing the ready to cry face in front of him, he gave up. “Of course I could help you Aiba-kun! Don’t worry!”

Masaki looked up at Sho, flashing a wide smile. Sho thought had never seen such a bright smile. If he didn’t know Masaki he would swear that there was an angel in front of him… a beautiful angel.

“You’re the best Sakurai-kun!” Sho didn’t have the chance to react as he was grabbed by his wrist and lead to his seat.

Masaki had brought his book and pointed the formula that was insisting on not getting into his head.

Sho looked at it. “You don’t understand the equation of third degree?!” he asked rather reluctantly.

Masaki lowered his gaze to his lap and bit his lower lip having an almost guilty expression written on his face. “I… guess… I’m really stupid…”

Before realizing it, Sho placed his hand on top of Masaki’s. “No! You’re not stupid! I never called you one… I…” it was then that he saw what he had just done and took it away with shame. “I’m… I’m sorry…”

Masaki just smiled and nodded negatively. “You don’t have to apologize Sakurai-kun. People apologize only if they do something wrong and as far as I can tell you didn’t!”

Sho would swear that his heart was making an effort to get free from his ribs. He had to calm down. He took Masaki’s notebook and started explaining about the equation. Soon he was able to relax and feel more comfortable.

“… You should consider math as a treasure hunting. The equation shows you the way to find to your goal... It’s…” Sho didn’t have the chance to finish his words as Masaki interrupted him.

“You should be more like that Sakurai-kun…” Sho turned his gaze to Masaki who was leaning to his left hand, looking straight in his eyes. “…relaxed… You’re way too interesting and it’s a pity that you don’t share your thoughts and your points of view with others…”

Sho kept staring at Masaki. Did he just say that I’m interesting?! Me?! Perhaps he’s just kind because I helped him… There’s no way I’m like that… no way…

The ring was heard. “Don’t doubt yourself so much Sakurai-kun… because I meant ever single word!” Masaki smiled widely and headed to his seat.

Soon the classes began and the time for the test came. Everyone was nervous; including Masaki. As the professor gave them the questions, Masaki turned his head over his shoulder and nodded softly to Sho. Can it be possible that he meant it?!
***
“Can you tell me what you’ve been doing a whole semester?!” was Kirita-sensei’s comment the following week, having the tests corrected. “Though there was a big surprise this time! I’ll start calling your names. Come and take them quietly. Sakurai Sho – 100 points”

As Sho stood up Kinashita’s voice was heard in the classroom, making everyone laugh. “As it was expected from the geek!”

Sho said nothing and with a lowered head took his test.

“Silence! One more comment Kinashita-kun and you will go to the principal! Aiba Masaki – 90 points. Congratulations Aiba-kun! I was really surprised when I saw your test!”

“I just saw math through a different perspective… It was as if I had to find the treasure at a treasure hunting…” Masaki said confidently as he was handed his test.

“That’s so cool Aiba-kun!” a girl said, followed by the rest of their classmates.

Masaki looked at Sho, his lips forming a wide smile. “See?! Sakurai-kun… I was right when I said that you’re interesting. Nagasawa-chan just called your theory cool!”

His words had a direct impact in the class. Everyone went silent and Sho felt rather embarrassed; or more correctly embarrassed and happy in the same time. Did he… did he just stand up for me?!
……………………………………………


The day Sho wished to and not to come came. He was no longer a high school student. The graduation ceremony finished without problems and with his family proud because he had managed to pass the examination for the University of Tokyo. He went outside. He needed some time alone; some time alone at that yard. He was sitting in front of the outdoor basketball court. He would leave that period of his life behind him forever. He wouldn’t see their faces again but unfortunately that also meant that he wouldn’t see his face again.

He closed his eyes, trying to form his silhouette in his mind, running up and down, shooting, cheering, laughing… He never dared to look at him being this close and now that he knew he had no more chance he somehow regretted it. Stupid…

“Sakurai-kun?! What are you doing here alone?! The others are inside drinking and eating… you won’t find anything left if you don’t hurry…”

Sho opened his eyes and saw him standing there, right in front of him. “It’s… I’m fine… I just wanted to come here…”

Masaki came and sat next to him. “Why did you never come here when we played?”

“I’m more into studying… I can’t understand sports very well… That’s why I guess…”

Masaki pouted and refused to look back at Sho. “Don’t lie… you understand… I know you do… you… you were smiling when our team won the last game…”

Sho was left dumbfounded. Does that mean that he was caught staring?! His mind was overworking, trying to figure out what could possibly these words mean.

“It would be nice if you were here to cheer me… I mean us up… You need your friends, right?!” Masaki continued shyly.

Sho couldn’t believe his ears. Friends?!

“Anyway… It doesn’t matter anymore… so now you are going to enroll Todai, business management if I’m not mistaken?!” it was obvious that Masaki sensed the other’s uneasiness and decided to change the subject.

Sho, though, was still left thinking about Masaki’s previous words. Friends…

“Sakurai-kun… are you listening to me?!” Sho coughed a bit.

“I’m sorry… yes… I’ll study business management…”

Masaki looked up in the sky. “I had no doubt. You are the smartest of us all! For me university is just out of question but thank God I was scouted and I’ve signed my first contract. My goal is to become a great pro basketball player!”

Sho looked at his former classmate. “You will be a star… I’m sure of that…”

“Do you promise me that you will come in person to the court?”

Sho didn’t have the chance to reply as he saw their classmates coming closer.

“Aiba-chan! We were looking for you… What are you doing here with the geek?” Masaki was grabbed by his arms. “C’mon… the party is about to start…”

 “I’ll be waiting!” Masaki’s voice reached Sho’s ears before disappearing into the main building.

He dragged his feet to the school gate. He turned around and took a deep breath. I promise…

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>


1 year ago


“Sakurai-san here’s the program of the meetings for tomorrow. I have also included all the information you requested for the American investors”

“Thank you Tanaka-san. You may leave now” Once his secretary left the office, Sho looked at the pile of documents left on his office and sighed. Being the new CEO was tough.  It’s not that he complained it but every single day there was the exact same routine. Work – sleep – sleep – work.

He took off the small white envelope, hidden in the first drawer at his left and looked at it: «Reunion of class 2004»

It had arrived three days ago. He couldn’t believe that he was actually the receiver of such an invitation, but then again why not?! He was not the geek anymore, he was the CEO of Sakurai Corporation. He was not wearing his school uniform but expensive suits while his glasses were replaced by contact lenses. Was there a reason for him to go to this reunion?! Perhaps not… He wouldn’t even remember me…
***
It was nine years ago. He had bought a ticket to the game. He had promised him that he would go to his game. And once again he felt as if he was casted a spell. He was flawless; perfect. Everyone was talking about the rising star of basketball, Aiba Masaki. Despite his young age, his talent was already showing off, ensuring him a promising career.

Sho was reluctant at first but he decided to wait and talk to him. He went to the players’ exit where he saw Masaki talking to someone else. He recognized him. It was their former classmate Matsumoto Jun – the other star of the school. Sho couldn’t hear what they were talking about but what he saw a few seconds later was enough; the way Jun claimed Masaki’s lips was more than enough. They say that a picture is 1000 words and it was true.

Sho felt his heart sinking but he knew that it was somehow logical. What did he expect?! Masaki had never shown him any kind of sign that he liked him. He didn’t even know his preferences in the first place, so why did he feel like that?! He scolded himself and left the place immediately. At least I kept my promise to you…
***
It was already 6 o’ clock. Sho was reading his newspaper, trying to keep his mind busy but it was useless. Every five seconds he would look on the wall across the room.

“What’s the point of going there anyway?!” he mumbled to himself.

Since that day Sho had decided to leave Masaki in the past. There was no point in keeping him in his mind. He was never his and he would never become. He knew he had to get rid of the torture. He had tried to find a boyfriend but no one seemed good enough to take this place in his heart. Most of them had agreed to date him because of his wealth and position in the high society. No one had his genuine smile.

The clock showed 7 o’ clock, no matter how hard he had tried to stop thinking about it he couldn’t find the necessary strength to discipline himself.

“Screw it… I’m going” it was already 7:30. He chose a pair of jeans, a white shirt with a black vest. He grabbed his leather jacket and stormed out of his house.

“Yoshida High School” that was the only words that left his mouth during the drive to the school. His eyes kept shifting from spot to spot as the car was moving around the roads to bring him to his destination.

“We have arrived sir” his driver announced and Sho took a deep breath before opening the door. It looked as if time had stopped and he was once again a student.  Everything looked exactly the same. He entered the gym which was decorated for the occasion, looking at everyone. He could recognize them. Kinashita, Nagasawa, Matsumoto, Yokoyama…

“Sakurai Sho!” it was a group of girls that recognized him, getting immediately all the attention.

Nagasawa immediately came closer smiling. “Sakurai-kun… I was afraid that you wouldn’t come… You were always the one who preferred to be on his own… I know that we were nothing in front of you… but I was hoping that you would come… despite your certainly busy schedule as CEO…” Sho didn’t miss the fact that her free hand carefully pushed her hair behind her ear as she smiled shyly looking lower than Sho. Sho felt almost sick. The most arrogant girl in the whole school was standing next to him trying to look attractive to him. She’s flirting…

Soon, everyone came around him. All he would receive were compliments, about his looks, about his brains, about everything. For some weird reason he had transformed from ‘the geek’ to ‘the star’. Star…! Sho kept looking around, his gaze agonizingly looking for him but he could not see him anywhere. He didn’t come… He smiled bitterly.

He was ready to leave when he heard Kinashita shouting at someone. “There you are idiot! I pay you by hour! Can’t you move your feet a bit?! There are so many guests without drinks!” He could see the waiter bow really low. Kinashita didn’t seem to pay attention and continued on the same level. “You were stupid back then, you’re stupid now!” The waiter turned around and saw Sho right in front of him.

Sho gasped. The waiter came closer and offered him a drink. “Sakurai-san… please here’s some champagne for you…” his voice was soft as whisper; his voice.

Sho couldn’t believe the image in front of his eyes. Why Masaki was there dressed as a waiter?! His body was frozen. Nagasawa was fast, took a glass from the tray and gave it to Sho who took it mechanically, without breaking the eye contact with him.

It wasn’t until seconds later that Masaki found fallen on the ground with all the glasses smashed along with him. Everyone burst into laughs. “I guess you’re really stupid! Useless! I’ll have it taken from your payment tonight!” Kinashita hissed. “Instead of being grateful for choosing you tonight for this special event – reunion and work – you chose to destroy everything… Useless…” he repeated.

Someone from the crowd that Sho couldn’t see started mocking his name, soon followed by everyone else. “A-I-BA-KA! A-I-BA-KA! A-I-BA-KA!” Sho felt as if he was not there; as if all this was a movie played on a screen in front of him. All those people who once found him cool, who once wanted to be his friend… everyone was now treating him like a scumbag.

“You know… I’m glad you had this accident. It would be really unfair such a stupid and naïve person like you to earn millions just because you can send the ball into a basket! You finally found the place that you really deserve Aiba-chan!”

Sho kept looking at the person in front of him, being on his knees among the broken glasses. Masaki slowly stood up. “I’m really sorry for what happened. I promise to be careful from now on…” Sho couldn’t believe his ears. He wouldn’t say anything?! He would simply accept everything?! Masaki wasn’t like that… he was stronger… he was positive… he was open… This man in front of him seemed like a shadow of the person he once knew. He remained the same beautiful but somehow the sparkle from his eyes had disappeared. The brightness was not any longer there.

Without giving it a second thought, Sho took out his wallet and gave Kinashita a quite large amount of money. “This is enough I guess?!” Then, walked fast towards Masaki and grabbed his wrist, taking him out of the gym to everyone’s surprise.
 ***
No matter how many times Masaki tried to free himself, Sho didn’t stop until they reached the basketball court. It was where he had last spoken with him… it was where he had to speak with him again.

“Who are you?” Sho asked him, his gaze piercing Masaki’s eyes. His tone left no margin of escape.

“You know who I am Sakurai-san…” Masaki responded in a really low voice.

“No I don’t know you. The Aiba Masaki I knew was, would always speak up, would smile, would shine…”

Masaki smiled bitterly. “The Aiba Masaki you’re speaking of doesn’t exist anymore… so you may have a point there… The Aiba Masaki you’re describing existed when he felt he owned the world… he was the one who thought that nothing could go wrong… That Aiba Masaki was naïve… perhaps too naïve for his own good…”

Sho could see Masaki’s eyes glittering under the light of the big lamp near them. “Everyone’s changing…” he muttered with a trembling voice. “You’ve changed… and I don’t mean about your looks…” Sho could see a hurt expression on the other’s face. “I always thought that you would keep your promise… but I guess I was wrong…”

Sho gasped. “You know…” Masaki continued “I’d always been looking at you. I loved the way you were secretly following me… and not because you had something to earn… Whenever I scored, I was hoping that there is this pair of eyes looking at me through the windows of our classroom, of the corridor… Basketball was my only charm. It was my only trump to get you to notice… to notice that I’m looking back at you… That’s why I wanted you to come to a game when I became a pro… but you never did… so don’t ask me that question… you should first make it to yourself…” Masaki paused for a few seconds and closed his eyes tightly.

“Then… I injured my knee… my career was finished and so was my chance to see you again… I was really stupid to actually hope that someone like you would like someone like me… but don’t worry Sakurai-san. I’ve learned my place” Masaki bit his lower lip guiltily. He looked ashamed of himself; as if he had revealed things he shouldn’t have. “I’m really sorry for this outburst…”

Sho felt his ears whistling weirdly. LIKE?! Did he just say that he liked me?!

Masaki realized the awkward silence and cleared his throat. “Anyway… I have to go back to work now… Excuse me…” but before he was able to leave, Sho caught his way.

“I did come…” Sho’s voice was trembling. “But you were already with company… There was no reason for me to interfere…”

Masaki looked at him frowning. “What are you talking about?! What company?!”

Sho looked at the ground as he uttered the following words. “Matsumoto Jun” Masaki gasped at the hearing of the name. “You two were kissing…”

“You saw us…” Masaki whispered.

Sho just nodded. “And you left immediately?!” Sho looked at Masaki confused.

“Why do you always choose to look without coming and talking in person? Why do you have to jump into conclusions on your own? Why?”

Sho couldn’t say anything. “Matsumoto Jun did kiss me once… it was right after a game… but I didn’t kiss him back. If you hadn’t left you would have seen that I slapped him and ran away… I was waiting for you… I had this tiny hope that you would show up… I was hoping that I would find the courage to tell you how I felt… but nothing…”

Sho was speechless. “There’s no way you would like someone like me… Everyone was making fun of me… I was the ugly geek…”

Masaki looked straight in Sho’s eyes. “You’re wrong Sakurai-san. In my eyes you were the cutest and the smartest boy I had ever seen. I was fascinated by the way you were focused when you were studying in the library. There were many times that I would borrow the books you had already borrowed… I wanted to explore that world of yours that seemed powerful and endless…”

“Why did you never say anything?” Sho whispered, still trying to process all the information he was receiving.

“How could I?! You were on the top while I was… well we all know that right?!”

“No…” Sho grabbed Masaki’s hands in his. “You were on the top. You were too bright. I was afraid…”

Masaki smiled bitterly, freeing his hands from Sho’s grip. “I guess it wasn’t meant to be… But it’s ok… All the people are changing… Didn’t you see our classmates?!”

Sho didn’t move a spot despite watching Aiba moving away. “They didn’t change. They are the exact same people… they are following the power. In our school days you represented that ‘power’ while now my place as the CEO of Sakurai Corporation fills their perspective…”

Masaki stopped his steps. “It was exactly ten years ago when I watched you leaving like this… Back then I was a coward and said nothing…” Sho closed his eyes and breathed deeply letting the fresh air enter his lungs. “But… I don’t intend to make the same mistake… I was looking at you for three whole years. You were the only one who could make me smile. I liked you… I needed you… like a plant needs the sun… you were my sun… and somehow you remain… I know that this Aiba I was formerly speaking of exists somewhere inside you. I could recognize him at some of your words. The same Sho exists in me as well. Books are still my company… I’m still shy… I still wear glasses – at least at home” he added, making Masaki laugh a bit. “I still like the way your laugh pierces the air… I still like your smile… I still find you hypnotizing… I still need you… I still like you Aiba Masaki. The real you, free of labels… just you…”

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>


Present


“Where’s my tie?” Sho asked from the bedroom.

“Where you took it off maybe?!” an answer came from the bathroom.

“But I can’t find it anywhere…” Sho whined.

“You are such an untidy person! And at first I thought you were joking!” the bathroom door opened revealing a silhouette in a light green bathrobe holding a tie in his left hand.

“Can you tell me exactly why you put your tie next to the hand towel?!”

Sho took it avoiding the other’s gaze. He went in front of the full-length mirror to put it on. He was still wearing his glasses and his hair was unmade. Out of the blue, two hands wrapped around his waist and saw him through the mirror.

“That’s my little geek!”

“Masaki!”

“What?! Every morning you look so much like that ‘Sakurai-kun’… and I’m extremely happy about it because it was him that I fell for…”

“You know… I’d never expect you to be such a teaser…” Sho said while trying to muffle his laugh.

“I didn’t know it myself. You inspire me…Sho-chan…” Sho turned around and held his boyfriend close to his body.

“What?!” Masaki said slightly embarrassed. He would always get embarrassed whenever Sho looked at him like that.

“I’m glad that I can see the bright ‘Aiba-kun’ as well. Thank you for giving me the chance…”

“Thank you for asking me…”

“I love you Masaki…”

“I love you too… Sho-chan…”





THE END





A.N. I wasn't planning on posting this os now but well you've made me really really happy and here it is dedicated to all of you!!! ^__^
I wanted some romantic Sakuraiba after all this drama in my multichap fic! lol

I hope you enjoyed it and as always your comments are <333!