Title: A Broken Promise

Author: Andy-chan (antimiya88)

Special thanks for all her support to my dear chrysiida_tori <3

Pairings: Sakuraiba (main), Sakumoto, Matsumiya (side), Junba (brothers), Yama (friendship)

Genre: AU, Drama, Angst, Romance

Rating: R - NC-17

Summary: "I promise you to always be by your side… I promise to never hurt you… I promise to never let you down…" This was the promise Sho had made to Masaki. Seven years have passed since then and Sho knows positively that he still loves his partner more than his life. But sometimes life has unexpected surprises. Will he be able to keep his promise or not?

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the boys unfortunately

Sho had been to the village nearby to buy some traditional sweets for Masaki. He still couldn’t believe they had managed to come this closer in such little time but he couldn’t feel happier about it. This nightmare was perhaps the reason to wake up from the lethargy they were both entrapped for the few past years.

He had just opened the door of his and Masaki’s room when he felt two arms wrapping around his waist. “Did you miss me… Sho-chan?” Sho froze. It was him. Why couldn’t he give up? Why did he have to persist so much?! Why? Before he could react he found himself pinned on the wall, while a mouth was leaving hungrily wet marks on the crook of his neck. He could tell that there was no lust in the bold action; just anger. Sho was feeling disgusted towards this person and himself since he had let the other cross the limits. But not this time… He had the chance to look at things clearly and he wasn’t going to repeat the same mistake once again. He used all of his might and pushed the other away so harshly that made him almost fall on the floor.

“I don’t even care how the hell you found us here. I will ask you to leave immediately before I ask the security of the resort to throw you out!” Sho was at the verge of starting punching the guy in front of him with no stop.

“So you’re turning down my offer…” the other said smirking as he stood up.

Sho sighed. “You misunderstood the situation jerk. I didn’t turn off any offer of yours because simply there was no offer in the first place! Your ridiculous proposition meant absolutely nothing for me. I’ve had enough these two months. What don’t you understand? LEAVE NOW!”

Jun only laughed, making Sho even angrier. The latter grabbed the other’s collar and brought him closer to him. “Leave me and Masaki alone for good or I’ll make sure you do it! Got it?!”

Jun freed himself. “Easy there!” he managed to say between his loud laughter. “You’re so funny when you’re this worked up!”

“What has happened and you have so much hatred towards Masaki? Why are you so persistent? Why do you want to destroy him no matter what?” Sho’s breathing had turned uneven. He couldn’t believe that Jun was not giving up even now, after having him thrown away from their apartment. It felt as if Masaki was his obsession. He couldn’t understand why but what mattered to him more was his husband. He knew they had hurt him a lot and he wasn’t going to continue. He would protect him, as he should have done from the beginning.

Jun went to the bed as if he had heard nothing and traced the sheets. “Uuuuh! Is that semen?” he turned around and looked at Sho. “You finally decided to take care of your live fucking doll? I bet h-”

He didn’t have the chance to continue as a strong punch landed on his face. “Asshole! You’ll die if you call Masaki that again! Get the hell out of here!”

“Not before I give to him a small present…”

Sho was ready to punch him once more when they heard another voice behind them.  It was Masaki who had just entered the room.

“Masaki…” But Masaki’s eyes were locked into Jun’s.

“That small present consists of what Jun? Is it videos of Sho jerking himself off calling your name… or maybe you and him kissing each other?” Surprisingly his voice was calm; perhaps too calm.

Jun didn’t know what to say. He didn’t expect his brother to know everything and still be there with Sho. He felt even more anger running down his veins.


“And you have forgiven him? Really? He has betrayed you…” Jun came closer to Masaki and lowered so that their gazes were at the exact same level. “Your husband was fantasizing over your brother and you’re here as if nothing has happened?! Are you this desperate? Are you so much in need to pretend that you’re still having someone as long as this someone stays by your side even if you mean nothing to him? Or you’re so understanding that you’d perhaps prefer to watch us fuck live so that you can imagine you’re in my position as your husband’s hard cock’s moving frantically inside me?”

Masaki said nothing in return. His eyes narrowed as he slapped Jun as forcefully as possible. “You should be ashamed of yourself… I don’t recognize you Jun… What the hell happened to you? TELL ME! WHAT THE HELL HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS? ISN’T IT ENOUGH THAT I HAVE ENDED UP IN THIS DAMN WHEELCHAIR? ISN’T IT ENOUGH THAT I HAVE DESTROYED MY LIFE LIKE THIS?”

Jun laughed, devilishly, neurotically. “Of course you don’t recognize Jun… Because Jun has already died. He died four years ago… when the only person who truly loved him, who truly cherished him and who never, ever criticized him decided to finish his life! And do you know who was the reason my beloved brother?”

Masaki was looking at him shocked. “YOU! Is by any chance the name Ikuta Toma familiar?” Masaki’s cores dilated at the hearing of the latter’s name. Jun saw it and laughed even louder. “Of course you do! It was you that informed daddy that you had seen me and him in Tokyo coming out of a bar… It was you who behind my back wanted to play the role ‘of the good son’ once again and informed him… You will tell me of course ‘Jun… no I was just worrying about you! That Ikuta Toma had not a good reputation… he was coming from a poor family… there were a lot of rumors about him… he liked to hang out in bars… he was drinking alcohol… he liked to fuck random people… I had to protect you’ I’m right, aren’t I?”

Jun looked at the perplexed expression of his brother and continued. “Of course someone would say how could you possibly know all of this since you were living away from Chiba… But the answer is simple. Masaki was always the model-son! Masaki was always the one who was close with his daddy! So daddy should have spoken these worries of his with his beloved son! Daddy should have told Masaki that I’m with Toma and all those rumors… He would have told Masaki that this was hurting our family’s reputation… Because you see, I was always the one who should look up to my perfect brother! Hanging around with Toma?! Having the whole neighborhood to discuss behind your back about what happened or how did this child turned out like this?! Ultimate disaster!” Jun laughed bitterly.

“You know everyone was judging Toma because he had tattoos and his friends were older… Everyone thought of him as if he was a delinquent. But guess what? He was the exact opposite! He was an angel… a pure angel. He was the only one who loved me! He was the only one who truly loved me and never measured me according to my family’s status or any other factor. We might have been to bars but he would never give to me alcohol… he didn’t introduced me to drugs either… he just introduced me to love… what it felt to give and take… what it felt to become one… For once in my life, I was feeling complete as a person because for once in my life I wasn’t compared to my perfect brother… I was just me!”

“Do you know what it is to be obliged to hear you own father finishing every single discussion with the phrase ‘be more like your brother’ or ‘I wish he was my real son and not you’? I guess not... since you were always the model and I was the useless one. And that model was just working for his own fame. Calling daddy immediately to report on me and Toma” Jun tried desperately to blink his tears away. “It was his birthday… he wanted us to have a romantic weekend away from Chiba where everyone was speaking bad of us but that turned out to be the worst choice he ever made”

“But Jun… You were underage and I saw you entering a love hotel with him and I got worried… I had received a call from mum… She was worried Jun… You had left without telling anyone a single thing…” Masaki whispered, avoiding his brother’s eyes.

“Masa-nii just do me a favor and shut your little mouth up! Let me finish first! When we came back, father was angrier than ever. He grounded me harshly, making it impossible for me to get out of the house for a month. He would walk me to school and back to home. But that wasn’t the worse part. He went to his family, accusing them and Toma… He forced Toma to leave me… I never learnt what he had told him but all I knew is that Toma started to avoid me. He wouldn’t return my calls; he wouldn’t answer my messages; he wouldn’t talk to me. I could see the sorrow in his eyes but he wouldn’t let me approach him. As the months were passing by, worse rumors started spreading everywhere, portraying him as the one who lured me and forced me into things… He was always attacked at school… he was even called rapist, junky…” Jun’s voice was trembling.

“I can’t even remember… What I remember clearly is exactly four years ago when I entered the school a Tuesday morning and saw almost all the students stand close to the basketball court, mumbling things. I made a few steps closer just to find his lifeless body lying on the ground… he was avoiding me all this time… he loved me too much… he wanted to take it all on his shoulders and he did… he left me behind… in a meaningless life… I wish I had died with him… I wish he wasn’t this selfish… I thought of killing myself too… That way we could perhaps be together forever, free of criticism… but then… I realized that it wasn’t what he would want for me… that’s why he had done it himself…”

“The only thing I could do was to take my revenge. First it was your beloved daddy’s turn! He was always accusing me of being a bad son… So I thought that for once, at least, I had to make it up for him and prove him right! I had to become this bad son… and I did! Surprisingly it was easier than I thought! I had to prove to every single jerk that it wasn’t Toma who had made me like that but them! I started going to bars and getting drunk, I started gambling, I started fucking with random guys! You can’t imagine how entertaining were their looks, when they had caught me getting fucked in the park!” Jun laughed loud, in an almost maniac way, as he tried to blink his tears away.

“And then it was you… Back then, I wasn’t able to do anything about it since I was still underage but not anymore. I turned twenty and here I am… useless once again… I had sworn I’d make you taste the same bitterness… losing your beloved one… even if it was in a different way…” Jun approached his brother who was looking shocked at his lap and forced him to look at him. “Tell me Masa-nii… what it felt like knowing that I made your husband thinking of me instead of you? Did it hurt? Did you feel for at least once in your life useless? Did you feel for once in your life what it feels to be me?”

Jun made a few steps backwards, away from his brother, turning his gaze outside the window. “You know I almost stopped… after that conversation we had… I thought that you might have already paid for it… but no… you didn’t change… you still had to inform daddy! You still had to play the role of the perfect son! You still had to do the same thing!” Masaki opened his mouth to say something but no sound came out of his mouth.

Jun smirked. “Yes! I lied! Yes! I took all the money from the bank and burnt them! So? Your beloved daddy has said it before… he doesn’t recognize me as his son… and I promised him that I would leave him for good with his only son that cared for him… All of you care only for yourselves… no one ever cared for me… truly cared for me…”

“I do care about you Jun…” Masaki’s voice was soft.

“Stop speaking bullshit Masa-nii. I’m not that stupid you know…”

“Can you hear me as well Jun?”

“I have nothing to hear!” Jun clenched his hands into fists. “I won’t hear any of your ridiculous, I’m sure, excuses”

Masaki though closed his eyes and continued speaking. “Does the name Takegawa Shintarou sound familiar?”

“How… how do you know him?” Jun couldn’t believe his ears.

Masaki smiled bitterly, lowering his gaze at his lap. “You never forget the name of the man who forced you to live like that for the rest of your life…”

Jun was left dumbfounded but this time it was Sho the one who spoke, after having come close to his husband. “Masaki what are you talking about?! You… you had an accident at a ski resort with your old friends from school… you-”

“No Sho-chan… I lied…” Masaki replied with his gaze still on his lap.

“Masaki?!” Sho’s voice was trembling, still trying to accept what he had just heard.

Jun, on the other hand, was left with his mouth open; unable to utter a single word. How could Masaki know this person? What did he mean by saying that it was because of this man that he ended up like that?! His mind was screaming to hear nothing… It was just too much for him. But if Masaki meant what he just said then what did that make him? An even worse monster… Why?

“Sho-chan… You do remember how I used to be troubled back at that time right?! It had all started a few months before your departure…” Sho could only nod. He did remember how Masaki was, always worried, unfocused; how he would speak with his mother for hours trying to calm her down. If he wasn’t working at the school, he would have traveled to Chiba.

“Your mind was always occupied with your family… though…” Sho turned his gaze to Jun as he continued speaking “you never actually said exactly what was going on…”

Masaki replied avoiding looking back at his younger brother. “I… It was then that mum had informed me that Jun had started gambling. At first I couldn’t believe it. I mean… I always knew that Jun was the reactionary type of teen, since he would always speak to you in a blunt way. He would always avoid speaking in general… Now I know but then…” Masaki gulped, as he remembered his brother’s former words.

“Anyway… I thought that by rejecting people he would make himself feel countable, important and I have to say I somehow was admiring him for that… since I was always the obedient one… since even if I wanted to oppose to something I was too afraid to actually do it…” Sho could see that his husband’s lower lip had started trembling as he uttered the last words. “Everyone’s born different. I was always able to wake up early in the morning and be energetic while Jun was always moody… I was trying to be good just because I wanted to be accepted… I was somehow envious of him… he had his father while I didn’t. I always had the fear that I would be left outside so I tried even harder. I just wanted to be with my family… That’s all… but it turned out the wrong way in the end… maybe I’m more stupid than I thought…”

“Masaki…”

“But that’s another story…” Masaki cleared his throat a bit before continuing speaking as calmly as possible. “So at first I didn’t pay much attention. I took it as another revolutionary action against dad. Little did I know… When mum called me bewildered that there was a large amount of money missing and that Jun would leave the house every single night to go to play cards or I don’t even know what kind of gambling games I knew it was nothing but simple. I knew immediately that something big was behind… Something had happened; something that dad no matter how much I insisted, he’d never tell me anything. I knew that Jun and Toma were no longer together but I had no idea that Toma had… co- committed suicide… And then… I tried to contact Jun directly. I would call him… I would leave him messages but nothing… Jun had already excluded me from his life. But even if he had I couldn’t do the same… I loved him too much to do something like that… I mean he’s the live proof that connected me with my family…”

Jun had sat at the edge of the bed, his stare blank, staring somewhere on the wooden floor. How could it be that Masaki was so worried about him? No… that was not the right question. The right question would be why on earth his brother was even worried about him in the first place?! He… Jun had decided since many years that Masaki would only care to cultivate his image of the ‘good son’… It doesn’t make any sense.

Masaki turned his wheel chair so that he had now his back on both his husband and brother. “One day I received a call from mum who was crying… She had overheard Jun, while being drunk; talking out loud, probably to himself, about being threatened if he hadn’t paid his debts by the end of the month and that life was shorter than he thought. At first, I thought that it was a bad joke. I didn’t want to believe it. It was then that I went to Chiba for a weekend but Jun was nowhere to be seen. I tried to speak with father but he would only answer me with a yes or a no… I thought it was just too much for him”

“And then mum told me that Jun had tried to speak with father but he was rejected any form of help. I knew how severe father could be and I took it as his way to make Jun realize his mistake. I couldn’t succeed though anything. But I just couldn’t let my brother down… I had to save him even if it meant going against anyone. I couldn’t know what exactly the relationship between Jun and father was or what might have happened between the two of them but what I knew for sure is that this attitude was way too harsh”

My research started only a few weeks after Sho-chan’s departure for the US. Asking questions around, soon I found out about Takegawa. I got really scared. It was yakuza… how did my brother get trapped? Why? My head was a mess. I tried but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t find any answers. After many attempts though, I managed to come in contact with him. He told me how much Jun owed to him. I was saving my money for years, so luckily with some help of mum I managed to find the whole amount needed. I thought that it would be the end but it wasn’t… at least for me…”

“Masaki…” Sho couldn’t believe his ears.

“With Sho-chan being in the US, it was easier for me to move freely. I went to Chiba secretly and found him and his men. I had the money they had asked for and a small bonus. I wanted to make sure that they would never bother Jun again. Unfortunately, what I hadn’t foreseen was the fact that Takegawa was the type who wished to leave no marks behind. Perhaps Jun is right… Perhaps I’m just too naïve to believe that I would simply give them the money and everything would be as if nothing had happened. Now that I think about it, I truly believe I was lucky that I’m not dead but the damage was already done…” Masaki sighed having his eyes tightly closed.

I never regretted it though. If they told me that Jun was facing a problem, even in this state, I would do it again… without a second thought. It was for my little brother…”

He moved closer to Jun and turned his gaze on him. “So tell me Jun, if that proves that I don’t care about you, then what does? What? Tell me” Masaki’s voice was trembling as a few tears made their appearance on his cheeks.

“Jun… I have faced a lot of difficulties since then… I felt no pain, only fears and insecurities… I had just turned into a completely useless man. I felt lost and let myself get lost even more day by day. I regret it though… but a part of what happened between you, Jun, and Sho-chan was also my fault” Jun looked at his brother dumbfounded. “I knew it from the first moment”

Jun opened his mouth to speak but no sound came out.

“I knew…  and I was hurt… I could tell that you were troubled. After I found out how you had left home my fears were even stronger… that’s why I spoke to you sincerely… I wanted to open up to you even if it was embarrassing… even if it was hurting me knowing that the person I was talking about my biggest fears was also the person who made them become real… but somehow I couldn’t get mad at you… I didn’t know… I didn’t know that because of my careless decision I would cause so much pain… perhaps it was God who made me pay for it…”

Jun couldn’t utter a single word. He fell on his knees on the floor burying his face in his palms. Masaki came closer to him and caressed softly his head. “Jun… I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I didn’t know… If I knew…” Jun looked at his brother’s eyes. “I swear to you… I would never destroy your happiness… Never! I was just stupid…”

Masaki felt his brother’s hands gripping his sleeves. His head was thrown on his lap, while his whole body was jerking because of the sobs. Masaki kept caressing Jun’s hair.

“-u antnichn” Masaki tried to understand what Jun muttered in his lap.

“Jun what did you say?”

“You are not nii-chan…” Jun immediately turned his gaze away but Masaki made him look at him back in the eyes.

“How did you call me?” Masaki’s lower lip was trembling.

“Nii-chan…” Jun said shyly.

“Do you know how much I wanted to be called like that by you? How much I wanted to be accepted by you?”

“I’m sorry nii-chan… I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I didn’t know… I’m sorry… ” Jun buried his head in Masaki’s lap crying even more.

“No… I’m sorry Jun… You have no idea how much… and I want you to be sure about something…” Masaki pecked his brother’s head. “I love you… I really love you Jun…”
***

Sho couldn’t hear anymore he got out of the room, leaving the two brothers alone. They needed some time on their own. He had lighted a cigarette, his gaze lost in the full of stars night sky as he was standing at the small terrace that was located at the end of their floor. He had never thought that behind the masquerade of the confidence and arrogance, Jun was hiding so much pain. He could have never expected to hear what he had heard that night.


He was still lost in his thoughts when he heard his husband approaching him from behind.

“Sho-chan?!” his tone was somehow reluctant.

Sho lowered himself caressing Masaki’s cheek as he looked closely at his eyes, trying to find if he was alright. “My love… Are you ok?” Masaki nodded. “Jun?”

Masaki lowered his head. “We spoke a lot… we still have to clear a lot of things up but I do hope that we will be ok… He was exhausted and he went back to his room. I thought that tomorrow we could have breakfast the two of us… I want to speak to him more and I believe that he needs me… Is it ok… Sho-chan?” Masaki asked Sho, his tone being shy.

“Of course Masaki… Don’t even ask me… It is what you should do… But now it’s late… We should rest too…”

Sho was ready to turn around when he heard his husband whispering. “Aren’t you mad at me?” He turned around looking at him confused. “You know…” Masaki gulped “about me lying to you about the accident but I… I didn’t want you to worry even more or try to find them… I just…”

Sho enwrapped him close to his body. “No… It only made me see what a diamond I almost lost inside from my arms… It only made me want to fight even more for you, Masaki…”

“Sho-chan…” was all that Masaki could say at the moment, shivering slightly as he wasn’t dressed for the cold outside.

Sho smiled. “Come, my love… I’ll make sure you stay warm…” 
………………………………………


Jun went back to his room trying to understand what he had just found out. The information was too much and he somehow felt empty. His hands gripped the doorknob and his heart was pounding like crazy. Will he be here? Of course not… you told him to go and leave you alone Jun… what do you want now?!

The door opened revealing an empty room. Jun laughed bitterly. He wanted him so much but it was his fault that the other had left. But he wanted him by his side…he needed to feel his hot breath on his skin… he needed his eyes looking through his soul. He needed him to make him feel human again; now more than ever.

“Nino…” it was then that he felt two small arms folding around his waist causing his breath to stop.

He turned around and saw him. He was there… he hadn’t left. Jun’s breathing accelerated. “Please… stay with me…” his lips were trembling and his voice was weak. “I need you Nino…” his hands clung on the smaller man’s shoulders. “Don’t leave me Nino… I’m sorry about before… I… I was stupid… really stupid… I never meant all those words… I… I love you… I really do… please don’t leave me Nino… please…”

“Shhh….” Nino hugged Jun tightly rubbing his back in an attempt to make him relax. He spread butterfly kisses on his face before making him look straight in his eyes.

“Even if you told me that you hated me I’d never leave… I love you Jun… I love you too much to be anywhere else but by your side…”

Jun looked at him with teary eyes. Nino smiled and brushed his lips with his thumb. “I’m sorry to inform you that you got stuck with me princess… forever…”

Jun said nothing in return. He just smashed their lips together. He had broken his promise to Toma. He had admitted his love for another one but somehow he felt complete… somehow he felt free and even if he was still afraid to say it out loud… he felt truly happy. 




TO BE CONTINUED…




A.N. Minna chapter 8 is up!!! ^^ I thought I would have done it earlier but in the end, I was too tired because of the trip and I ended up sleeping all day...
It was an intense chapter, wasn't it?! Junba really spoke for the first time! Poor Jun and poor Masaki... They have both suffered so much... We found out what had happened with Jun and why he was feeling all this hatred towards his brother. I was telling you that he wasn't simply a jerk! But in the end he regretted it and he let his true feelings come out! And yay! Nino didn't leave! :)
Masaki, on the other hand, told everything! His accident had nothing to do with skiing... it was for his brother...
The tension is gone now! In the next one the two brothers will come even closer and I promise you more Sakuraiba as well as Matsumiya! ;)

I hope you enjoyed it and as always your comments are <333!!!


See you next week!