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Title: Tomodachi (One-Shot)
Author: Andy-chan (antimiya88)
Pairings: Ohmiya (main & one-sided?), Sakumiya (side), Ohno x Ishihara Satomi, Aiba x OC, Jun x OC
Genre: romance, angst, slice of life
Rating: R
Summary: Nino met Ohno Satoshi twelve years ago when the latter transferred to his class. From the moment he met him he felt that they shared a similar aura. Little by little, they came closer. Before he knew it, Nino had already fallen in love with him. There was only one problem... Ohno Satoshi was his best friend...
Disclaimer: Kazu belongs to his Oh-chan and Oh-chan belongs to his Kazu
Nine years ago…
“I can’t believe they let us leave two hours earlier!” Nino exclaimed happily as he left the storage he was working at part-time. He was waiting to walk across the street when he saw a curry restaurant at the corner of the road. A smile appeared on his face.
He’ll surely like it! he thought as he looked at the bag he was carrying with his right hand. But I must hurry or it will turn cold!
It had been one year since Satoshi had moved in with him. Jun would always find the opportunity to tell him that it was the wrong thing to do and that he should reconsider and move out but Nino wouldn’t listen to him. Surely it was tough sometimes… like when Satoshi would come into the kitchen wearing nothing but his boxers to grab his morning coffee or when he’d grip his hand tightly whenever they’d watch a horror movie but Nino had to admit that he loved being with him. Living with Satoshi had revealed other sides of him… sides that had made Nino fall deeper in love with him, if that was possible. Like those times he had fallen ill. Seeing him getting completely panicked and calling the doctor even when it was a cold, made Nino feel loved… perhaps not in the way he’d wish but still it made him feel warm inside.
He placed the key in the lock, humming his favorite song. He could smell the hot curry and even if he wasn’t the biggest fan of it, he could already imagine how Satoshi’s face would glow in happiness and that was more than enough. To his surprise, he found another pair of shoes as he entered… a pair of sneakers; clearly a considerably smaller size than Jun’s or Masaki’s ones. He walked into the living room but it was empty… only the TV was still on, most probably forgotten.
With every step forward, he felt his heart pounding painfully. It couldn’t be… right? He left the food in the kitchen and walked as soundlessly as possible towards the bedrooms. He froze. That was undoubtedly a moan… not one of pain… but one of pleasure. He knew he should leave but his legs continued on walking on their own stopping only when he reached the door that wasn’t closed firmly. And he saw him… them… The way that he moaned her name while he was moving inside of her… moving his hips in slow but powerful thrusts while his mouth was occupied with one of her breasts… the way he was finding his pleasure in her body… the way her fingers were buried in his back leaving marks… while her feet were pushing him to go deeper… while she was screaming his first name…
His mind had stopped working, his eyes stuck on the couple of the bed that was now moving faster, more desperately… lost in one another. No… He couldn’t watch anymore… he ran away as soundlessly as possible stumbling on his feet, falling on the floor. But no… he had no right to disturb this moment of theirs… He passed by the kitchen when he caught with the corner of his eye the bag with the two curry plates. He knew he couldn’t escape. Satoshi would have known he had come back home at some point. He was his friend, wasn’t he? With a trembling hand, he picked up a post-it.
Hey Lover boy!
I thought you’d need some energy boost!
See you in the morning! Have lots of fun! ;)
He read the note twice. It sounded… playful and supportive… exactly like it should be. He placed it on the bag hurriedly and grabbed his keys, getting out of the apartment. He climbed down the stairs almost falling on the last one, his whole body shaking. It wasn’t that he hadn’t thought of it… He had… many times… but he preferred to hope falsely that he would never actually have to face the reality. He shook his head trying to get rid of the painful images he had just witnessed but no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t.
He needed desperately to forget. He took the metro, getting out at Shinjuku. He entered the first club he saw and went straight to the bar ordering a drink. It didn’t take much time to be hit on by several guys. Others would call him cute… others pretty… and he could only smirk, his heart clenching and unclenching painfully. It was so ironic… so many wanting him when he only wanted one… one that he would never have. He drank his fifth one-shot in one go, not even feeling it burning his throat. His eyesight had already turned blurry. He went to the dancefloor. His hips were moving fast to the rhythm. With the alcohol in his veins it almost felt as if he could forget…
“Hey you…” a low, deep voice reached his ears from behind.
Nino smirked when he saw two hands holding him by the waist. He turned around and to his surprise the one hugging him could be described as fairly… handsome; no… if he was honest enough with himself he should admit that that he was rather… hot. He was the exact opposite from Satoshi but that was probably for the best. He had something very manly on him… he was taller with nice sculpted muscles, as Nino could see from the tight shirt he was wearing.
“Hey you, too…” Nino replied huskily. It felt so nice to be held like this… to feel someone’s body this close to his.
“I’m Sho…” the other whispered in his ear and Nino moaned when he felt the tip of Sho’s tongue teasing his earlobe.
“Nino…”
“Nice to meet you, Nino…” the other repeated in a suggestive way, rotating his hips slowly that sent chills down Nino’s spine.
They danced having their bodies glued against each other… Song after song, Nino could feel himself relaxing, giving in more to the other’s ministrations. His body was reacting, feeling the sweet fog of desire covering him. Images of Satoshi’s naked body kept flashing in his mind… making him want to feel the same… feel desired… feel satisfied… even if it was with someone else. Without thinking about it twice, he crushed his lips against Sho’s smiling relieved when he felt the other responding to him almost greedily. Soon, they moved to the toilets without even stopping in between. Nino was thrown against the narrow door of the cubicle they had entered. Feeling the other’s hot tongue tasting his neck was enough to make him bring his hands into his hair and move his hips, giving him the message to continue.
Sho was surely a skilled lover… he had already made him cum only by toying him… or was it because he couldn’t even think having sex when the only one he wanted was Satoshi?! Perhaps that was the reason… perhaps it was both… He didn’t care… He simply wanted to do it… to forget… about him… her… about everything…
“Fuck me, Sho…” the words came out from his mouth without even realizing them.
The other looked at him for a few seconds as if he was trying to read him. “Are you sure you want this with me?”
Nino smiled bitterly. “Yes… because he will never want to do it…”
“Taken?” Sho asked as he attached his mouth on the exposed skin right under Nino’s collarbones.
“No… friend…” Nino replied with difficulty and jumped up in the air wrapping his legs around Sho’s waist. “Now, please… hurry up! I want you!”
The other didn’t need to listen twice. Nino screamed as his prostate was hit dead on. His nails burying into Sho’s arms. Tears filled his eyes as he remembered how her nails were buried into his skin.
“Stop thinking…” Sho mumbled as he kissed the tears away.
Nino looked deep into his eyes, focusing in them till he felt his body shaking as the orgasm tore him. Sho threw the used condom in the toilet and flushed it before helping Nino get dressed.
“Are you ok?”
Nino frowned detecting a trace of concern in the other’s voice.
“Yes… don’t worry…”
Sho smiled as he brushed his hand through Nino’s hair. “I’m glad…” he dragged the latter back to the bar where he made a nod to the bartender. A pen was given to him. “Here’s my number” he muttered as he wrote it on Nino’s hand. “If you ever feel lonely, give me a call! Bye!” and with that he winked at him and left.
Nino looked at the number for a second and ran back to the basins to clean it off but then… those disturbing images came back to his mind. Perhaps… perhaps it wasn’t such a bad idea to keep it…
Forty minutes later he was knocking on Jun’s door. It was almost midnight but couldn’t go back home tonight. He saw his friend opening the door in his pajamas, wearing glasses and his hair rather messy. He knew Jun was ready to curse but didn’t. He also knew the other would understand... he always did. He could feel his lower lip trembling and he was sure tears had made their appearance. Jun sighed deeply before pulling him inside. Nino had expected him to yell, to tell him that he was right but to his surprise Jun remained silent. He only hugged him tightly.
That was all Nino needed. Feeling all the power he had leaving him, he buried in his friend’s hug letting his sobs free, his whole body jerking.
“It’s ok… it’s ok…” Jun whispered in his ear trying to calm him down. “I’m right here…”
~.~.~
“Nino!”
“Good morning, lover boy!” Nino winked at Satoshi as he let his keys on the small table next to the entrance. He saw the other blushing madly and tilted his head. “Don’t tell me that you will go all shy now!”
“But you… you… you heard…” Satoshi said lowering his head.
“It wasn’t my fault that you were loud…” Nino shrugged his shoulders. “Who would have thought that you who speak this calm and soft could be this… expressive in bed?! I guess Aiba-chan would be disappointed knowing that he has a serious contestant!”
“Stop mocking me!” Satoshi replied with an even deeper blush as he hit softly Nino’s head.
“It’s not my fault, Oh-chan!” Nino said in his usual mischievous tone, his hand giving the usual smack on the other’s butt. “You know that I find you cute when you act all shy!”
“You’ll never change!” Satoshi said trying to hold his laughter.
“No!” Nino said as he tilted his head. “But that’s why we’re friends, aren’t we?”
Satoshi sighed. “Yes, we are!”
***
Four years ago…
Nino was checking his tie on the mirror near the entrance when he heard Satoshi’s voice from behind.
“You look really good, Nino! Don’t worry about looking ridiculous, because you don’t!”
Nino smiled as he nodded. The other could read him so well. “You know that I don’t get dressed in such clothes… I feel so… not me…”
“You look fine! Now, let’s go. Aiba-chan’s floor is the third?”
“Yes!”
They entered in the elevator saying nothing. They rang the bell and immediately a smiling-from-ear-to-ear Masaki appeared in front of them.
“Nino-chan! Oh-chan! Welcome! Did you come together?”
Nino smacked playfully his friend’s forehead. “He lives the opposite way of my apartment how would we come together? We just met at the entrance!”
“Sorry for asking stupid questions…” Masaki pouted before his smile came back. “I guess I am too nervous…”
“It was you who decided to propose to her on Christmas Eve which also happens to be your birthday and in front of all your friends…”
“I know but I still feel nervous!”
Satoshi muffled a laugh. “You two are impossible! C’mon! Let’s go greet Yuko-san!”
Nino sighed but followed Satoshi. He saw Masaki’s girlfriend wearing a black dress that reached her knees and her hair being beautifully arranged in a bun. She had a faint blush on her cheeks and Nino knew she was already aware of Masaki’s plans.
As expected, she started crying when she saw Masaki falling on his knee while holding the ring. Cheers echoed in the room and wishes to the newly engaged couple.
Nino had himself tears in his eyes; though he couldn’t be completely sure if they were there because he was happy for Masaki and Yuko or because he was sad for himself… He knew that he would never be able to do something like that… not with whom he wished.
He was holding a glass of wine looking blankly on the wooden floor when suddenly, he felt a feather-like touch on his left shoulder.
“Ninomiya-san, am I right?”
Nino frowned. Next to him there was a young woman; an attractive and certainly flirtatious young woman. He could never deal well with such occasions. “Yes… You… can call me Nino though. That’s how everyone calls me…” he added rather nervously and sipped some of the wine.
“You look cute!” the young woman said muffling a giggling laugh. “I am Takahisa Narumiko. All my friends though call me Miko!”
Nino nodded politely when he caught a glimpse of a short but certainly beautiful girl smiling shyly to Satoshi. Nino could see that Satoshi was flirting back. His whole body language was showing it clearly. Suddenly he felt a knot on his throat.
“Her name’s Ishihara Satomi. Yuko’s cousin from the side of her mother. She’s really beautiful and I must admit that she’s a good girl…” Nino turned his gaze to Miko who was smiling rather sadly at him. “It seems like your friend was the lucky one to have her…”
Nino frowned trying to understand what the other was implying. His eyes bulged. “Ah! No! No! It isn’t like that!”
“But you looked as if you were jealous…”
“It’s just that our Nino is a bit too possessive with everyone, even with his friends. You don’t want to know how he has been sulking since Aiba-chan announced that he’s getting engaged!”
Jun came out of nowhere and Nino sighed relieved. He would always bring him out of any difficult situation. He wanted him to be around but when Sakura demanded her boyfriend back, Nino knew Jun had no choice but to follow her. He found it amusing how such a hypothetical DoS would turn into a complete DoM when it came to her. But then, wasn’t he one?! Perhaps it was love the one at fault…
“Nino-san being like that…” Miko said after a long pause of silence as she reluctantly came closer to Nino. “That’s so cute!”
Nino could only shrug his shoulders and drink some more. Satoshi across the room was leaning closer, whispering something funny if he judged by the way the girl was trying to hold her laugh back.
“I guess it’s my charm!” he winked at Miko trying to distract himself and it was working till he was left with no wine. “Wait here… I need to refill!”
“Of course!” she beamed a wide smile and Nino smiled back. If he wasn’t gay, he was sure he’d go for her. She was shy but bold in the same time… she was… cute…
He went to the table where all the bottles were in line and chose the red wine he had been drinking. He ticked his tongue annoyed when he realized it was empty. The other choice would be white that he really didn’t like and scotch… What the hell will I do?
“Hey, Nino!” Satoshi stood next to him sounding excited. “You are not going to believe it!”
“You met this beautiful girl, Satomi her name, who you really like and found out that you share many things in common, including the sense of humor!”
“H- how did you-?”
Nino smirked placing his hand on Satoshi’s shoulder before leaning close to him to whisper in his ear. “You are far too obvious, my dear friend!” a playful smack landed on Satoshi’s butt.
“I don’t know though… she’s too beautiful and I’m not…”
“You’re not…?”
“Handsome like Aiba-chan or Jun-kun… I’m not cute like you… How could she really like some-”
“You might not have the typical, ikemen in terms of idol rules, beauty but you are fooling yourself if you believe that you’re not attractive! Your eyes might not be the biggest ones but their shape is unique, the expressions someone can see in them are enough to make them want to fall in the abyss called your soul… you always say that you don’t like your cheeks but I find them adorable. They make you look cute like a kid… they give you a youthfulness that makes you irresistible… especially when you pout… and your lips curve into one of the most beautiful smiles I have ever seen… your-” Nino gasped. What was he doing?! He cleared his throat getting his composure back. A small smirk appeared at the edge of his lips as he turned back to Satoshi who was staring at him astonished. “I… hope you got the boost you needed… now go to her and flirt some more… And don’t worry…” he whispered back in his ear. “Once you have her in the bed, she won’t leave… I have been a witness of how well you know the manual, remember?!”
“Nino…” Satoshi said embarrassed but also happy. “I had never expected you thought so high of me…”
“Stupid…” Nino said sounding him now embarrassed. “Go! She’s already looking over here!”
Satoshi squeezed Nino’s shoulder and mumbled a thank you before going back to her. Nino turned and looked at them. He had met Satoshi’s girlfriends in the past but something this time made it more painful than usual… perhaps because he sensed that this was something to stay. He turned and looked at Miko who was still waiting for him. Even if he did go back, what would he gain?! Nothing… he’d only falsely raise her hopes to crash them down later. No… He wasn’t a scum…
He went to the inner room to find his coat and avoiding everyone, he left. Once the cold weather hit his face, he felt better. It wasn’t that he wasn’t happy for his friends but a small part of him felt jealous. Everyone had found their special someone while he had none. For around an hour he wandered around the streets looking at the Christmas themed decorations of the shop windows, letting his mind go for a while… he needed those moments of having to think of absolutely nothing.
He had sat on a bench close to Ebisu garden having a beer on his hand when he decided it was about time to face reality. He pulled out his phone. There were several missed calls from Jun, Masaki and Satoshi. He quickly typed a message sending it to the one he knew he’d understand him.
To: Jun
I couldn’t stay longer and didn’t want
to make you worry… Say that I had enough
of alcohol and I’m really sorry to Aiba-chan and
Yuko-san! Ok?
He was ready to put it back in his pocket when he decided to try his luck. It wasn’t the first time that he’d look completely desperate.
To: Sho
Hey… Would I be too desperate if I
asked your company tonight?
To his surprise the reply came in seconds, making Nino laugh. Perhaps he wasn’t the only desperate here and somehow that felt soothing.
From: Sho
Hey… No… You would be Santa bringing
me one hell of a present!
He raised his hand to the first taxi he saw coming and gave the other’s address. It had been years since they started meeting. Nino didn’t feel anything for Sho, most likely like the latter didn’t feel anything for him. They would only meet and have sex. At first, Nino had felt guilty… guilty of betraying him and the love he had for him. But soon, he realized that his body had needs… needs that as much as he tried to suppress and ignore were still there. It was something purely physical… a way to stop feeling empty when things were unbearable.
The cases he had screamed Satoshi’s name when he came shudderingly weren’t few. He knew it wasn’t the classiest thing to do when it was someone else doing the job but Sho had never said anything; neither seemed he bothered by it. He had never asked him, like Nino had never asked Sho. They weren’t friends… they were just two men who met and had sex... Simple as that.
He got off the taxi and knocked on the door.
“Who is it?”
“Santa!” Nino replied in a playful way.
The door opened revealing Sho wearing only a pair of jeans.
“Wow! That’s fast!” Nino said as he was pulled inside. Seconds later he found himself thrown on the other’s double bed. A moan escaped from his throat when he felt a hot mouth sucking hungrily his neck. “More…” he said huskily as he felt the other’s weight on him. Yes… that was exactly what he needed that night… to forget…
~.~.~
“I still don’t understand why he should have left without saying anything…” Satoshi repeated sighing.
“You know how Nino is! He never wants others to worry for him!” Jun said patting Satoshi’s back. “Especially such a night!”
“But… what if he needed help?! Since he didn’t feel well…”
“He texted me saying that he was already in a taxi going home! Don’t worry! He’s fine!”
Satoshi nodded but was still skeptical. Why would Nino text Jun and not him? Wasn’t he supposed to be his best friend? Sometimes he felt as if he couldn’t understand him… as if there was a side of his unreachable to him…
“I’m sure he chose me because he knows I’m the coolest of all… and he didn’t want to spoil your time with her…” Jun said as if he could read his mind. “Nino thinks a bit too much!”
Satoshi sighed. Nino…
***
Two years ago…
“You will live together?” Nino asked sulking.
Satoshi sighed. “Yes, Nino! I do think it’s about time… Masaki and Yuko are already expecting their first child, Jun and Sakura got married two months ago… I want to settle down too!”
“I am surrounded by people who want to get old so soon…” Nino said in a dramatic tone that made Satoshi sigh. “I can’t believe you all decided to settle down when you’re only in your 20s! People are supposed to have fun till they reach at least thirty! It’s the rule of nature!”
“No… I’d say it’s more the rule of Nino! You surely look as if you are enjoying your single life!”
“Of course I do!”
“I still find it weird though…” Satoshi mumbled as he drank some of his tea.
“You find weird what?”
“That you are a player… I always thought you’d be the guy for a relationship…” Satoshi could swear that for a second Nino’s eyes darkened.
“Are you kidding me?! Relationships will only age you… Don’t you see how Aiba-chan got those traces of wrinkles at his eyes? No, thank you! I’m still 27! Life is to enjoy!”
“I’m sure he does enjoy it!”
“While he hears high pitched cries in the middle of the night or while he has sex, killing the mood?!”
“Nino!” Satoshi tried to hold his laughs. “Anyway… I didn’t say I will get married… Just that we will live together… I don’t like living alone…”
“It was you who left my apartment though…” Nino replied sounding grumpy.
“You kept embarrassing me every time I brought a girl, Nino!”
Nino smirked wickedly as he leaned closer. “It’s not my fault that you looked so cute when I was teasing you… It was yours!”
“And yet you never did so!”
Nino tilted his head confused. “Never did what?”
“Bring someone back to the apartment!”
Nino smiled bitterly. “I guess no one was worth it…”
“See?! I knew you were the romantic type… You’re just in denial because you haven’t found the one…”
Nino gulped. “Maybe…”
“Trust me! You will know when you will!” Satoshi said smiling widely. “Though to be honest I really thought that Miko-san could be that one… She had insisted for months!”
Nino moved on his seat, looking clearly nervous. “She had… I admit she was a cute girl but it wasn’t there… the flame…”
“I guess you’re right…” Satoshi spoke while giving an understanding nod. “But when you do find the one I want to be the first one to know, ok?”
Nino smirked. “Of course you’d be the first to know! As if I’d lose that face of surprise of yours for anything in this world!”
***
One year ago…
“Are you sure you don’t want to come?” Masaki asked with a pout.
“With all of you drooling over your women?! I think I’ll pass!” Nino said as he lied on the sofa.
“But you can bring yours, too!”
Nino looked at his friend with his eyebrow raised. “The last one I fucked - I don’t remember her name - was surely sexy but I’m sure her vocabulary is limited to ‘faster’ and ‘like this’! So, bring her for what reason?!”
Masaki pouted even more. “But it’d be so much fun! All of us in the onsen as couples, now!”
“I will still cheer up for you!”
Jun cleared his throat. “I’m sure Nino will think about it!”
Nino knew that everyone was staring at him. “Fine! I will think about it!” He caught the small smile on Satoshi’s smile and felt guilty because he had nothing to think about.
***
“It’s him…”
Nino looked up and saw Sho sitting back on the bed holding two cups of coffee. Nino turned his eyes back on the phone. Satoshi had sent him a photo of the three couples having that small spring on their backs saying that they were all missing him.
“Yes… They are in an onsen, Chiba… We had been there almost ten years ago…”
“Ah… Here’s your coffee!”
“Thanks…” Nino mumbled as he placed his phone back on the bedside table. “Sho, can I ask you something, if I’m not too discreet?”
“Sure!”
“Why do you keep meeting with me?”
“Because I’m not stupid to miss hot sex?!”
Nino laughed. “No… what I meant is why you choose to have meaningless sex? Haven’t you found someone?” He could feel the other stiffening.
“Let’s say that we are in a similar case…”
Nino looked at the other whose face had turned gloomy. “Friend?”
Sho smiled bitterly. “No… taken…”
“Sorry…” Nino whispered not knowing what else to say.
“We’re pathetic, aren’t we?!”
Nino chose not to confirm it. Perhaps they were but it wasn’t their fault. “No… we’re just in love…”
***
Present day…
“NINO! NINO! Open the door!”
Nino had closed his ears wanting not to hear the loud bangs on his door. He was still dressed in his clothes. He hadn’t moved from the floor. It had been a while since he had no more tears to shed but he felt too numb to move.
The bangs though continued.
“If you don’t open, I swear I’ll break it!”
He had never heard Satoshi like that in the twelve years he knew him. He was afraid… afraid that he’d hate him… afraid that he’d reject him as a friend… afraid he’d disappear from his life.
“Kazu…” this time the voice sounded desperate… worried…
Nino gasped. He had dreamt of hearing the other calling him like that countless times and yet now that he had, it felt like a sting to his heart.
“Please, open the door… I need to talk to you… please…”
He couldn’t stand it anymore. With trembling hands he turned the lock and opened the door before going to the sofa, not wanting to meet the other’s gaze. He heard the door closing and footsteps coming closer to him.
“Nino…” Satoshi kneeled in front of him, trying to meet Nino’s lowered gaze. “Please, look at me…” his voice didn’t betray any sign of anger and Nino decided to look at him with difficulty. “Talk to me…”
“I…” Nino whispered with trembling voice “I am sorry…”
“Nino…”
Nino brushed the tears that were running down his cheeks with the back of his hand. “I am really sorry…”
“Nino… please… tell me what is going on…”
Nino shook his head fast. “I… can’t… I can’t… you’ll hate me!”
“Why would I hate you?!”
“Because I’ve been lying to you! I’ve been lying to you for twelve years!” Nino said louder and fell backwards. “I’m not the friend you always thought I were!”
“Nino… what are you talking about?”
Nino let out a loud laugh that hid pain… lots of pain. “I… I can’t… you’ll be disgusted! I… please… don’t…”
“There’s no way I’d feel disgusted!”
“Really…?! What if you knew that your supposedly best friend would get a hard on whenever he thought of you? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend had stolen your kiss when you had come to him for comfort? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend, had sneaked many times secretly in your bedroom while you were sleeping just to feel your warmth by his side? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend, was dying from jealousy every time he saw you kissing with a girlfriend, envying her because he wanted to be the one kissing you? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend, wanted to scream at you that he had already found the one but this one would never be his? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend is screaming your name every time he gets fucked by another man? What if you knew that your best friend is helplessly in love with you? TELL ME!”
Satoshi was left speechless.
Nino smirked bitterly when minutes passed by and no word came out of the other’s mouth. “See? I knew it… You are disgusted…” he stood up and headed towards his door to open it. “I don’t want to bring you in a difficult position, Oh-chan… I mean… Ohno-kun… please… you may go… I understand…”
To his surprise a grip on his wrist forbade him from making another step.
“You… you are gay?”
Nino sighed. “Yes…”
“And you are in love with me… for…?” Satoshi continued in the same still shocked but certainly not hostile tone.
“Twelve years…” Nino whispered defeated. “I’m really sor-” he didn’t have the chance to finish his words.
“How much have I made you suffer?” Satoshi’s question made Nino gasp. He looked at the other whose eyes were glittering from tears.
“You don-”
“A lot… You had heard me having… sex… when you had bought us curry… That’s why you left…” Nino lowered his head. “And me the stupid… I’ve been blind… There was always this small voice in my mind, telling me that I was missing something… I knew that I was missing something, I just couldn’t imagine that it was me the one to-”
“I…”
“All these years… Nino…” Satoshi hugged Nino tightly. “I’m so sorry…”
“You’re not disgusted with me?” Nino asked dumbfounded. He expected the other to call him disgusting, untrustworthy… to ask him never to be close to him again… not to say that he’s sorry… certainly not to hold him in his arms as he did at the moment.
“Why do you insist that I’d be disgusted with you?” Satoshi’s voice was also trembling.
“For having touching you…? For dirtying you in my mind…? For-”
“Your heart is pure, Nino… I know it is…”
“Oh-chan… but-”
“I would never be disgusted with you …”
“So… hmm… could that mean that… perhaps you’d… me…?” Nino felt Satoshi breaking the hug and looking directly into his eyes.
“You know that I love you very much, Nino… You are my best friend…” Satoshi’s voice was weak but Nino knew he meant every single word… exactly how he meant that he’d never be able to return his feelings.
“I knew that I had no chance with you, Oh-chan… I… lack some basic parts…” he tried to sound playful but knew he failed dramatically.
“I always thought that we are completing each other… I…”
“Don’t worry, Oh-chan. I know it. We can’t choose our sexuality. You’re straight. I’m gay…” Despite his efforts, more tears ran down his cheeks as he whispered the last words.
“Nino… I am sorry… I’m really sorry…” Satoshi replied with difficulty not being able to watch his precious friend being in so much pain.
Nino broke down completely. “Stupid me…” but he no matter how much he tried his body kept jerking from the cries. He was pulled into a hug.
“A part of me wished I was…” Satoshi whispered in Nino’s ear as he caressed his back in an attempt to calm him down. “I’m sorry…”
Nino kept crying letting the tears wet Satoshi’s shirt. It wasn’t that he was surprised yet hearing the rejection loud and clear from the other’s lips was somehow unbearable.
“Oh-chan…” he whispered once he had calmed down. “I’m really happy for you and Satomi-chan… I mean it… She’s the best for you!” he knew his voice trembled a bit but tried his best not to break into sobs again. “I’m such a nuisance though… putting you through that emotional roller coaster when you should be all happy and excited to propose…”
“I just want us to be ok… however you want that ok to be… if you need space, time… I just don’t want to lose you… You’re a precious person to me, Nino”
“You won’t… I promise… But you should really go now… You have to create the most romantic night!”
“You’ll be fine?”
Nino sighed as he pushed the other from the door. “I will be…”
Satoshi nodded and left. Nino closed the door letting his head lean against it. He wasn’t fine but he would be… He could still have him in his life…
It was already dark outside. He was sitting on his sofa hanging his knees in a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt falling loosely on his thin figure. He tried to focus on the fact that Satoshi had accepted him… all of him… without questions or awkwardness. It was then that he thought of him. He picked up the phone and dialed the number.
“What a surprise?! Since when do we call each other?!”
“You should tell him…”
“What?”
“The one you love… you should tell him… even if he rejects you, you should tell him…”
“You did?”
“Yes. I was rejected – obviously – but he decided not to let me out of his life… I feel terribly but also as if a burden has been lifted up from my shoulders. So, go to him and tell him how you feel!”
“You think so…?”
“Yes, Sho”
He ended the call and sighed. He went to the kitchen to prepare himself a tea. He didn’t want to think that Satoshi would have already placed the ring in her finger, making love to her.
Twenty minutes later, he heard someone ringing his bell. Who could that be? He opened it, surprised to find Sho.
“May I come in?”
“Sure…” he let the other enter getting more surprised when he saw that underneath the coat he was wearing a pair of black sweatpants with their matching jacket on top. “I could handle it tonight…”
Sho looked at him rather perplexed for a second before he nodded in realization. “I didn’t come here for that, Nino…”
“Oh… Then, what…?”
It was obvious that the other was nervous.
“You told me I should confess to the one I love even though I’d be rejected…”
“Yes…” Nino whispered still trying to understand what the other was trying to tell him.
“That’s what I came to do…”
Nin frowned before he gasped, making a few steps backwards.
“I am in love with you, Ninomiya Kazunari. For nine whole years… Since I saw you coming to the shop I was working at the time. You had come with him, Ohno Satoshi, to buy the second console for PlayStation. Something in your laugh caught my attention. I was sure you were a couple but when I heard him, I realized that you weren’t… I had tasted in the past what a crush over a straight guy could mean but you seemed deeply in love. And then I accidentally saw you in the club… I figured out that something must have happened… Before I knew it, I had already approached you… The rest… well… you know…”
“You… you mean you kept having sex with me… hearing me calling out his name when you…” Nino felt he’d fall.
“If it was the only way I could be with you, then yes… It was hurting me but you’d still come to me… You proved in a way that you needed me…”
Nino looked at the other closely. Seeing the eyes of his having turned red, telling him that he did love him. His hand reached for the other’s cheek that felt hot under his touch. “You make me feel safe…” he whispered without even realizing. “I do need you, Sho…”
“Nino…?”
Nino took the latter’s hand leading him to his bedroom without saying anything.
“Nino, are you sure? You… you have told me that you don’t like to bring someone in your bedroom…”
“Hmm… I have but only the ones who are not worth it…” he sat on the bed looking at the other. “I would like to try for someone like you, Sho…”
“Nino… you… mean it?” the other’s voice cracked.
Nino smiled feeling his eyes getting teary as he nodded. “Yes…” he took Sho’s hand bringing him closer. “Make love to me…”
“Nino…”
“Kazu…” Nino whispered as he brought their lips closer. “Call me, Kazu…”
***
Wedding day…
“I knew you’d be nervous but to actually spill water on your suit?! That surely surpassed my expectations!”
Satoshi’s eyes bulged. Almost trembling, he turned around and saw Nino leaning on the door with his hands folded in front of his chest.
“Nino?”
Nino sighed as he came closer. “You really are useless! I wonder what you would do without me!”
“Nino… you… you really came!”
Nino winked at him. “As if I could lose the chance to see Oh-chan forgetting his vows in front of everyone…”
“You disappeared these past few months…”
“I did… but I needed it… I had to clear things up… but don’t worry I’ve come back as good as new and with much greater force!” he winked at him and let his hand touch the other’s butt. “How I’ve missed this cute butt of yours, Oh-chan!”
They both laughed but stopped when they heard someone clearing his throat. “Jeez, Sho-chan! I didn’t do anything! Just a friendly gesture!”
Satoshi nodded at the other. “Nice to meet you”
“I’m Sakurai Sho, nice to meet you too!”
“Didn’t I get myself one hot boyfriend?”
Satoshi smiled widely. “You did!” Nino’s face had glowed from happiness as he had spoken. He was sure that his friend had found the one.
Soon, Jun and Masaki appeared to tell Satoshi that it was about time to go, surprised to find Sho in there. Nino explained who he was blushing and got a few cheering whistles and teasing comments. He couldn’t be happier that all his friends had accepted him. Masaki had even proposed that once Satoshi and Satomi were back from their honeymoon they could all go together to the onsen as couples, making Jun give him a smack on the head as he pulled him out of the room telling him that they were already late.
Nino was also about to follow them when Satoshi grabbed him by his shoulder to whisper in his ear. “I am glad you kept your promise and let me be the first to know that you found your special one!”
Nino looked at his friend and smiled. “I always keep my promises!”
Satoshi hurried to leave as Jun’s voice was sounding angrier and angrier.
Sho caressed Nino’s cheek before he pecked his lips. “You know that I love you!”
Smiling, Nino turned around and hugged his boyfriend. “I do! I love you too, Sho-chan!”
“Hurry up, Nino! We will be late! You decided to come so you better come because being the groom’s best man isn’t only a case to make him feel embarrassed as you’ve probably planned but also do some tasks!” Jun yelled from outside causing Nino to laugh out loud.
“You really are happy!” Sho whispered in his ear, before placing a feather-like kiss on his cheek.
“I am. I have you…” Nino whispered. “I have them…”
“You have him…” Sho added as he wrapped his hands around Nino’s slim waist. There was no trace of jealousy.
Nino smiled because Sho knew him well.
“Yes… He’s my best friend…” he replied and surprisingly there was anything missing anymore. Perhaps because that was the place that Satoshi fitted the best in his life… like his best friend…
THE END
A.N. Sooo minna this is the first time I tried something like that! ^_^ I know it's a bit depressing - I cried myself for the first time as I was writing it - but I wanted to be realistic. I don't think that someone can turn gay simply like that. Ohno proved how much he loved Nino by keeping him by his side and mostly by feeling guilty for all the sadness he had caused to him, even if it was unvoluntarily. I believe that in its own way it does have a happy ending!!! Ohmiya still have each other and Nino realized that there was someone else by his side all these years that could be his special one! I admit I am a bit nervous posting this since it's a kind of story I don't think I've written so far... ><
My dear Dani (
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dani_mathoz) I hope it turned out as you had thought of it!I really hope you enjoyed it and as always your comments are <333!!!
See you very soon,
Andy ^_^
*Chapter 11 of "Crosslinked Chaos" will be posted this Sunday! ;)
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